Fitness

Gym, Gains & Getting Going

It’s been almost a year and a half since I started my fitness journey. There’s been a whole load of ups as well as some downs that I genuinely thought I wouldn’t come back from. I’ve laughed, I’ve cried, I’ve put myself in hospital and I’ve found a bunch of supportive as fuck, kick ass people.

I talked about starting this journey a good six months before I found a personal trainer and stepped a foot in the gym. My mind was torn between thoughts of wether I could actually do this and wether it even mattered what I thought, I just needed to do it

Honestly that first step was the hardest but also one of the best I’ve ever taken in my life.

When I first started it was off the back of being bed bound and I didn’t really have a goal other than to just get my ass there and survive.

Starting an exercise routine is hard enough as your average sedentary person. When you add some chronic pain, seizures and all the other health problems that can come along with them, it’s even fucking harder.

I still don’t have a specific goal other than surviving the session, but the affect regular training has had on me over the last 18months has been incredible, There may not have been some drastic weight loss transformation, but the changes physically and mentally have made every tear or panic attack worth it.

  • I’ve gained a lot more muscle and strength than I thought I ever would.
  • I’ve gained confidence
  • A good 80% of the time I can get off the floor myself if I have a seizure.
  • I’ve learnt the difference between good and bad pain.
  • Physically I cope with high pain days better
  • I’ve gained a little control of my diet. It’s not perfect but it’s also not total chaos.
  • I’ve learnt that weight / the number on the scale is not the be all and end all.
  • I’ve made some really close friends and finally on this list…..
  • I’ve proved in more ways than one I’m stronger than I thought

The main point of this post wasn’t just to tell you what I’ve learnt so far on this never ending journey…. (It’s a lifestyle y’all).

I also wanted to encourage others who may be thinking of working out, getting a personal trainer and taking that first step. Plus those who may be early on in developing a regular exercise routine, yeah it’s gonna suck at times but keeping at it may just change your life.

I dunno if you’ve found my rambling helpful or not. I deffo want to do more fitness type posts including fitness fashion. Us big boobed, plus size girls like to look cute while melting in our own sweat. #Facts

If you’ve got an idea or suggestion for a post let me know and until next time…..

Love Always

Charlotte

xxx

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chronic illness · Personal

I’m not perfect

I’ve written, rewritten and then written again this post I don’t know how many times. Maybe grab a drink because believe me, there’s a lot I want to say. I know from experience though it’ll probably come out a bunch of swearing ramblings with the point I was tryna make in the middle somewhere. I apologise in advance. However it’s all personal thoughts from the heart.

If you’ve read any of my posts here or on my ‘old blog’ www.missclx.com you’ll have noticed I tend to write exactly as I speak. So yeah, nothing I ever write is going to be the greatest piece of grammatical reading. (I bet you’re looking forward to the book already 😉 ) I’m never going to be the most perfect or most popular blogger. I’m just never going to be perfect in life.

In December 2017 I had every intention of doing blogmas. I had some great content ideas, was feeling festive and inspired… Then chronic pain took hold, like really fucking took hold. I’ve struggled for a long time with pain, but nothing and I mean NOTHING ever prepares you for the moment you contemplate throwing yourself in front of a car or straight up killing yourself two weeks before Christmas. YES I was in THAT much pain. If I got hit by a car, best case scenario I’d break both my legs, end up needing surgery and drugging up to my eyeballs. That would be enough time for the pain in my face to chill the fuck out. Worst case scenario, well we all know what that is, but hey at least I wouldn’t be in pain right? I’m used to the rollercoaster of up and down days. That day … was shit.

Here’s a little mind fuck for you… You get to a place where you feel comfortable in your skin and your body. Even if it doesn’t always work right. Then you have to start medication that causes an average weight gain of 40 pounds. You can be body happy and ill or obese and pain free, you can’t have both.. I bet you’re reading this thinking the answers obvious. To most it is, and to me it was too. Right now though I can’t help feel disgusted when in the mirror.

Charlotte this is sooooo depressing. Why are you telling us this stuff ? First of all people wanted me to write more personal posts. Second and most importantly of all as a way for me to express myself. Believe it or not that was why I started to blog in the first place….for me. Honestly I think a lot of bloggers / vloggers forget that before they turned their blogs into businesses, they were just safe little corners of the internet where you could express yourself. BE yourself…

I’m so sick of pretending to be something I’m not, whether it’s online, or in real life, all I want to be is me.

The only goal I have for 2018 is happiness. I truly hope to share my journey some of that happiness with you on here

I won’t promise you an upload schedule, because I’ll only fail and end up annoyed with myself. I really need to beat myself up less going forward. I do have some plans for a blog overhaul, new look etc as well as some cool content but I’ll keep you all in suspense.

Remember to follow so you don’t miss out !!

Love

Charlotte

xxx